A letter to another mother

*A mother on a Facebook group that I belong to posted yesterday that she lost her baby a week ago at 22 weeks gestation. This is my letter to her*

Dear Mother Warrior,

I don’t’ know you and we have never met but since I saw your post you have been on my mind all day. I am so sorry and saddened to hear of your loss. Like you, I am a mother and for that reason alone I am compelled to write you this letter.

I call you a Mother Warrior. The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines a warrior as “a person engaged in some struggle or conflict” (m-w.com). You are in a struggle now. You, as a mother, as a warrior, as a person will fight and heal.

I have never lost a child but my heart aches and cries with you. I think back to my excitement at 22 weeks and couldn’t imagine the pain and suffering you have gone through over the past week.

You are a mother as your body helped create and carry your baby, cradling her with love until unforeseen circumstances pushed her out of your womb too early.

You got a precious 20 minutes with her. I’m sure those 20 minutes don’t seem like much but at the same time feel like a lifetime. You got to see her, feel her and she got to feel the love that you were waiting to give her even though her arrival was too early.

But you were strong enough. Brave enough. You reached out. You shared your story. You wanted others to know what you went through. You didn’t want to suffer in silence. So bravely you let strangers, other mothers  in to take a peek at your life as it stands right now. As mothers we stick together, band together to protect one another. Now in your need, we are showing you love and support.

I don’t’ know the pain and suffering you are going through but there are mother warriors out there who like you, have overcome obstacles. They have been faced with adversities and have overcome hurdles, fences and walls put in their way. Mother warriors can take a situation and make good out of it. I am sure it’s hard now to see any good in this.  But out of this you will become stronger. Use your mother warrior powers and lean on your loved ones; family and friends who are there to support you.

Feel how you feel. Let your mind, body and soul heal how it needs to heal. Talk to people, read books, blogs etc to try to get some closure. There might always be the lingering “why” but don’t let that get in the way of your family and friends who love you.

Most of all remember the precious life that you created and got to spend time with. You got to see her, kiss her and love her. She is now your guardian angel. She is looking over you from above.

May you know no more suffering. May you find hope, love and strength in those who you surround yourself with and by those who surround themselves with you. May you be blessed with many more happy memories in the years to come.

Thinking of you with love,



  1. Dani says:

    Beautifully written and said. Love the post! 🙂

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